5 reasons to grow a beard
1. Every human-form messiah and prophet I can think of had one, Chuck Norris included. Imagine how many chicks frothed on Jesus back in the day AND orgies were totally ‘in’
2. The extra face foliage adds rugged mystique and also helps conceal your identity when dealing with boarder security
3. You instantly appear to be a successful musician/artist/actor
4. If you still look like you have a Harry Potter collection under your bed and are secretly waiting for the day quidditch becomes a real sport, A beard can add a few years.
5. If all your dreams come shattering around your ankles in a weekend of excessive time in Narnia and you lose your job, you can always don a flanno and become a lumberjack.